Write About a Time You Felt Capable

Hmmmmmm. 

When I was a freshman in high school, I had succumbed to a gruesome depressive state. I packed all my feelings and thoughts inside. In fact, I packed them so compactly, that if you poked me, I'd appear as if I was the happiest girl in the world, and I'd ask you to seek advice from me. I didn't want advice. I wanted to sleep, I wanted to lose weight, I wanted something other than the life high school was giving me. I didn't like the social aspect of it, not the schoolwork, or even the detrimental friendships I was experiencing. 

After I was dropped off at home, I would walk to this little park at the end of my street. I'd sit on slide alone, and I'd look out into the woods. I'd blast the saddest song on my iPod, and listen for about a half hour, on repeat. Sometimes, a tear or tears would fall, and sometimes they wouldn't. Something about being alone, in the beginning months of the school year, when the weather was getting colder, something about looking out into the woods, and then laying down on the slide, and looking into the sky. Something about no one getting that same view, no one feeling so in the moment, at that particular time, made me feel capable. It made me feel at peace. And with peace, with peace I feel most capable.